Saturday, May 08, 2010

God has given me life, over and over again, for now.....

"A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him/her from them all". Psalm 34:19. (We're made righteous through Jesus, we have none of our own).
This is what I feel like my life has been, full of many troubles, but somehow, I have come through all of them, each and every time, by God's grace and mercy.

Even as a young person, looking back, I see God's hand on my life. A few examples are:
As a teenager, going through pretty severe depression, by keeping a diary, I came out of the depression, no medication, no counseling, etc. That strength came from God, I believe.

Then, in my latter part of my teens, I drove a car like a maniac. I look back very often, to this day, and shudder at the thought of my thoughtlessness. One time driving down a gravel road, with a car load of girls, I tried to get to 100 mpr. I am so very thankful, very, very thankful, that I didn't kill anyone. There were a few other driving incidents that I'm sure there were angels watching over me. Weaving in and out of lanes, almost hitting cars, drag racing in town, and driving drunk. How did I ever get out of those situations without major problems, I have no idea.

When living in Minneapolis, away from Grand Forks, I was almost over the edge with Paranoia, getting even a streak of white hair from fear. I would rather have been killed then gotten raped. (I had previously already almost been date raped). Then, all of a sudden, I snapped out of it, for no reason. I believe that God was with me, where else does inner strength come from?!

God has delivered me from many fears, and depressions. When I moved to Chicago, when working at American Airlines, I then became a born again Christian. Before, I experienced extreme loneliness. Becoming a Christian in 1971, was the happiest time of my life. Once I was in a forest, praising God, when a man, naked and full of anger, came up to me. A soft voice in my head said, 'Get up', and I did. I got away, but was full of fear. The next day, in church, I literally felt the hand of God remove the fear out of my body, and the flash backs stopped. It happened when the preacher said the verse, "Love covers a multitude of sin".

After I was a Christian for a couple of years, I got married. In the first year, my ex wanted a divorce, but decided Christians don't divorce. The Jesus People group that I was in, split up. I went through a year of depression. Again, no meds, no counseling, but the album, 'Growing Pains' by Jaimie Owens, now Collins, pulled me out of the depression, every day a song lifted me up.

After being married for 7 yrs., it was decided that I could have a child. I got pregnant immediately, with twin boys. I was hemorrhaging, the boys were 3 months early. I didn't realize that that was one of my very possible calls to death. (Today the boys are 30 yrs. old, and happily married to beautiful, Christian women ).

After 12 yrs of marriage, my ex finally divorced me. It was devastating. I came back to my roots, Jesus People, and to my original 'calling', along with the boys, to Chicago. Two years later, I married Jon Trott, who also went through a devastating divorce, and he had 2 little girls that I helped raise. Getting into a new relationship was very hard, but now, over twenty years later, God has done tons of healing through this very loving, godly husband.

After being married to Jon, a few years later, I almost drowned in a river, but it wasn't my time yet.

In the year of 2000, I had Thyroid Cancer and Breast Cancer. I went though lots and lots of chemo, radiation treatments, etc. etc. I am now 10 years cancer free. Thank You God!

How we found the Thyroid Cancer was because of a breathing problem I had. My breathing became worse and worse, partly due to tubulation during my Thyroidectomy. This year my breathing got where the trachea was about the size of a coffee stirrer. The doctors said it doesn't get any worse. So, on April 14th of this year, I had reconstructive surgery, a quite major procedure. The first week or two were intense, to say the least. I am recuperating now, and doing very well. On the 11th of May I will get a smaller trach, and then either this month, or on June 7th, (my surgeon is out of town, probably teaching other surgeons this new surgery. Has only been around for 10 years). The trach will be out completely, and I will be able to extend my life, for as long as I can have. I would like to live to 90 yrs. My health otherwise is quite good.

My dear God is very merciful and loving. I do hope for God to be glorified in my life. He is worthy of all of our trust. We asked many, many people to pray. I believe that it is God's will for believers to uphold one another in prayer, and I pray that I can become a better prayer warrior then ever.

"The Lord your God is with you. He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you. He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing". Zephaniah 3:17b. A verse that all of us should take to heart, God loves us, He really does. It is one that I am still trying to sink into my heart. He showed us His great love for us first when Jesus came to die a horrible death, that many could be saved, any who would say yes. I sure couldn't have lived my life without God delivering me from my many troubles, and giving me the grace to walk through what I have come through. Choose the Lord today, He is amazing and loves you so!!!!

One day I will die, of course, and even though the transition from life to death to life is scary and foreign, I do look forward to being with my Maker, in a paradise that this world doesn't know yet.

1 Comments:

At 6:06 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi, Carol, and thanks again for your wonderful testimony of redemption and receiving the love of God. I have always valued your deep channel of consolation and compassion, your font of wisdom, your steady and bright spirit. You are one of the treasures that fell into my life one day.
Funny...I've gone through both thyroid and breast cancer too--odd, two old ducks like us should have such a similiar case history--but, like yourself, live in the healing that comes from Jesus, not the doubt and fear that comes from wondering "What's next?"
Love you dearly, Sue

 

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